After reading Zable's 'The Wall', find five examples of imagery, language techniques or descriptive language that you believe stands out for you.
In your response, LIST the examples with quotation marks first, THEN explain briefly for each one WHY it stands out.
Basically, I'm trying to ascertain what interests you in a piece of writing that you may otherwise find a little dull!
M
1. “Learner drivers are cruising the weed-infested runway”.
ReplyDeleteThis is a descriptive piece or writing that illustrates the image of having cars buzzing about in every direction because they are nervous beginners.
2. “Again the vibrancy is draining from her face”
This means that she is afraid to confront a Nazi. Her tone flattens because she is scared.
3. “Vines cascade down mountainsides as we approach yet another no-mans-land: a strip of earth that cuts through the forest”
This is quite a descriptive piece of text because it gives the reader a very clear image of what the author is trying to describe
4. “My expectations had been infiltrated by the mystique that had enveloped the wall during the quarter century since the workers began laying the barbed wire barriers that would seal off the west berlin from escaping east German citizens”
This is a descriptive piece of language because the character is seeing the Berlin wall for the first time and comparing what the thought of it and what it actually is.
5. “Flowers spill from roof tops”
This is very clear image of what the character sees.
Well done, Will - you've certainly picked clever pieces of text that do indeed have descriptive language. We will need to try and expand your repertoire! I mean, we need to get more techniques!
DeleteI think we're a little off the pace with this here in 9F so we will work on it this week!
Good try!
1. “Vines cascade down mountainsides as we approach yet another no-mans-land: a strip of earth that cuts through the forest”
ReplyDeleteThis describes the mountain side giving us a vision of what it may look like (blank land cut through to show no owner ship)
2. "he drove wildly through the city. his body was trembling with anger.
this describes his anger and how furious he was with her. His body actually shook because he was so jittery.
3. One of them stood over me, scrutinising my passport. he was sizing me up, his eyes moving from my face to the photo...
this tells me the officer was in no mood to be messing about and was rushing. had no intentions of talking or being polite. adn he was obviously using his power of justice to its full extent.
4. ,where i listen to the stident voice of nina simone, recorded in live performance. Her singing is savage and urgent.
nina simone is obviously nervous and not used to such a large crowd so she is rushing her self, not thinking about the music or what she is saying.
5. “My expectations had been infiltrated by the mystique that had enveloped the wall during the quarter century since the workers began laying the barbed wire barriers that would seal off the west berlin from escaping east German citizens”
She explains how the sight of the berlin wall doesn't compare to what she thought it would be. not as grand.
Good quotes, what about techniques?
DeleteThey're really important.
We'll do some work on them this week.
1. ‘Naked women winked from billboards…’ – In this sentence, the author uses personification. Personification is when living characteristics are given to non-living things, in this case, the girls on the billboards (which are nonliving) are winking (doing a living thing). The effect this has on the reader is that it tells us exactly what the words are saying because we can relate to the act because we are living.
ReplyDelete2. ‘…Black servant girl, down on her knees, in a rundown hotel.’ – This piece of writing demonstrates adjectives, descriptive language. Descriptive language describes the things they are talking about to give us a better understanding of the five senses. For example in this passage it gives us an image of the color of the girls skin, the position she is in and the type of hotel she is staying at.
3. ‘The landscape was well ordered, symmetrical..’ – again in this sentence descriptive language is use. This time it is used to give us image in our head of how the landscape looks to the character.
4. ‘But it deeply distressed me…I no longer could feel proud of who I was..’ – in these words expressed by the character in the novel, we are told exactly how they felt at the time when it happened. This is called emotive language. This helps us to get involved in the story and gives us the choice to make about how we feel about what just happened after hearing how the main character feels.
5. ‘Neon lights blinked..’ – the author in this sentence has again used personification. By saying that the ‘neon lights blinked…’ he gives us an idea of how bright and effective the lights of the city appeared thepeople who saw them. This gets us more involved and makes us visualize and compare this city to one of our own. Eg: Sydney.
Eugenio,
DeleteSome really good work in here!
I like your pick-up of the billboards...I'm going to speak to the class about this one. I think you've been quite clever here as Zable is obviously trying to have the billboard come to life - I wonder if other teachers would agree with us!
Good effort and great detail.
"He was so nice to me when he was young"
ReplyDeleteIt leaves areas for change open while hinting something as well
This tells me that when she was young, her father was very caring and loving but as the father gets older and so does the girl, the girl must put up with having a drunken dad that doesnt have much control over himself after a few beers.
"It was a crazy, wonderful time. I studied nursing."
This passage leaves hints to war or a significant change in her life
"Hey gal, finish them floors! Get upstairs!What's wrong with you? Earn your keep here!"
This passage sticks out to me due to the inequality of genders and how slavery is an option
"Just as I thought I had secured my independence, my dad hops in the car and threatens to beat me"
This passage stands out to me because this proves a change from the first passage I wrote. It show drunken rage
"If you want to meet the former Nazi's, I can show you to them".
This passage stands out to me as you can possibly get to know about the war from first hand experience in a post war society
Rightio, Boris.
DeleteYou've chosen some clever quotes here.
Now, I need you to ensure that you can pick WHY they stood out to you. What effect did the techniques have?
Need a little more detail next time, OK?
Solid start, let's build on it.
1."No-man's-land
ReplyDeleteThis catches my attention when read as it makes me wonder why this it called "No-Man's-Land.
2."he drove wildly through the city. his body was trembling with anger."
This creates suspense encouraging the reader to read on to finding out what will happen next.
3."The tale of an elderly necromancer and alchemist"
I have watched many of TV shows and played many games with Necromancers and Alchemist in it make it stand out.
4."It was a crazy, wonderful time. I studied nursing, had my share of lovers, and came to know these streets and the city's Renaissance history"
The story feels like it is coming to a climax making the story more engaging.
5."Anna pauses. The animation drains from her face like a photo returning to its negative."
This creates an image in the readers mind of a woman's facial expressions fading away. Making the reader think more about the story and what it looked like.
I very much liked your chosen quotes! They stood out to me too!
DeleteBUT where are your techniques? Read what I've written on Boris Becker's post just above this one...
We'll work on it this week.
1. "World war had been supplanted by cold war, countries split apart, families divided."
ReplyDeleteIt shows that war is very disastrous and it affects every one no matter if they are innocent or not.
2. "The officer continued his inspection, directing me to open my backpack, rifling through my belongings..."
It shows the security back in Berlin
3. From this distance, and from the height of the railway embankment, the wall appeared smaller than I had anticipated.
It shows that the wall isn't what his was expecting of
4. "She is a servant girl gritting her teeth and grinning, biding her time, dreaming of the black freighter with the skull and crossbones on its masthead making its way into the harbour"
She is hoping that she could be rescued from the pirates, while she is still a servant
5. "The landscape is well ordered, symmetrical, the land green and fertile."
This sentence used a range of descriptive language to express the nature he is looking towards at that moment
Good effort, TC!
DeleteSome good work here - your choice of techniques needs to be more consistent and remember, we need to see what effect those techniques had on you. We'll delve deeper this week...
1" the weed infested runway.
ReplyDeletethis is a very descriptive piece because it gives the reader a very impulsive and clear image of how the city must of been, visually.
2'flowers spill from the roof tops"
this piece of writing tells us what the character has seen as he has wonder through the streets".
3 " hear the wall stands dividing family from family".
this piece of writing shows us how powerful this non moving wall has torn families apart
4 vines cascade down the mountainsides as we approach yet another no mans land"
this piece of writing shows just how abandoned looking and scary this wall really is !
5 again the vibrancy is draining from her face"
this piece of writing shows that she is afraid to confront the german man, she turns pale because she is scared and frightened!
Not too bad Callum!
DeleteI very much like your chosen quotes...a little similar to the other ones that are posted above yours...
Where are your techniques? We need them, they're very important!
More detail and effort this week, OK?
"Naked women winked from billboards shop windows blazed with designer label fashions"
ReplyDeletethis is a descriptive language and a writing piece where there is a contrast and the descriptive language that takes place during this quote is when he sees the naked women winking and he describes their movements also because of the designer label clothing which stands out and because it is made with the top of the range materials it would stand out through the window therefore being able to describe as blazing. the reason that i chose this quote to analyses because it really caught my attention due to the fact that it truly describes what the character witnessed.
"The barbwire was fortified with electric fences and enforced concrete and an inner fence making of a stretch of no mans land, up to 100 meters in width the stretch came known as "death strip"
the descriptive language in this quote explains the environment that surrounded the character as he describes the harsh and well structured environment. the reason for me choosing this quote and why it stood out to me was because it really describes how locked down some countries are.
"Nuremberg is beautiful don"t you think she says her spirits lifting"
The descriptive language in this quote really shows this the character is observing his environment and describing its natural beauty the reason that i chose this quote and that is stood out to me was because its from his point of view that his surroundings are all natural.
"Hitler Youth stadium confronted by the circular congress hall built in the image of the roman coliseum"
this quote really shows descriptive language as he observes the Hitler youth stadium and he describes it as it has a resemblance to the roman coliseum. the reason for me to chose this quote was that the character compares the look of one stadium to the roman coliseum.
"black servant girl down on her knees in a rundown hotel"
this piece of writing shows a descriptive piece of writing as it first develops our understanding o the five senses and in this it also opens a new chapter where it mentions the color of the girls skin as well as her action for example on her knees.
Best in the class...whoever a2nv is...
DeleteGreat detail, a little clumsy in parts and needs to be given a more 'academic' voice but I'm very impressed with your effort - all that I can ask for!!
"The officer continued his inspection, directing me to open my backpack, rifling through my belongings..."
ReplyDeletethis quote shows us the about of security there was in berlin at the tome of the berlin wall
"again the vibrancy is draining from her face"
this quote tells us that the girl is afraid to confront the Nazi in the story because of her background
"No-man's-land
no mans land makes me think who's land is it and what is so bad about it
"He was so nice to me when he was young"
this quote tells me that the girl thinks that her father was nice to her when she was young and it tells me that her father has changed over time
"One of them stood over me, scrutinising my passport. he was sizing me up, his eyes moving from my face to the photo.."
this quote tells us that the police or inspector believes that he has the authority to do whatever he pleases to the traveler. he is trying to intimidate the traveler.
Sound start, WW...
DeleteYou will need to explain why you've chosen these quotes. Remember how the question asked you for techniques? This is really important for not only this unit but also for the others too!
Let's improve on this is weeks 3 and 4.
1. "There are whispers of a day of reckoning, when the wall will be torn be torn apart and the concrete hacked to rubble."
ReplyDeleteThis shows that the people want the wall to get torn down but are not allowed to talk of this matter as they will be punished if authority hears people spreading this rumour.
2. "And all the while Nina Simone is singing of vengeance. She is a servant girl gritting her teeth and grinning, biding her time."
This draws a picture in my mind about what she looks like and that she doesn't seem happy about how people have treated her and the lifestyle that she is currently in.
3. "The Landscape is well ordered, symmetrical, the land green and fertile."
For me, this quote is trying to tell me that the people who are currently in East Germany that don't have much choice in life and that their life is dictated and rostered.
4. "Hey gal, finish them floors! Get Upstairs! Whats wrong with you? Earn your keep here!"
This shows that some women were treated like slaves and the men were very sexist and didn't care about females.
5. "They pursue me in my dreams, begging me to return to the fold."
I believe this is trying to tell the reader that the leader of East Germany did not like people trying to achieve their dreams because then something in the system might fail.
Certainly shows a good effort to try and describe the intentions of Zable BUT where are your techniques? These are really important.
DeleteWe'll do more this week.
Language Techniques:
ReplyDeleteMetaphor: “The train had broken free from the underground tube” p.79 it stands out because the train is released from the darkness of the tunnel into the light of day.
Onomatopoeia (formation or use of words that imitate the sound associated with something) “crunch of boots on gravel”. P.80 It stands out because its like you can feel and hear the crunch of the boots walking on the gravel.
Metaphor: “He was such a weary, beaten man, with the eyes of a cornered animal”. P.85 It stands out because the writer tries to create a link between a man that is scared and animal that is scared.
Metaphor: “The animation drains from her face like a photo returning to its negative”. P.85 It stands out because straight away it tells you that the person is in shock, because the colour is draining from her face.
Emotive language (language refers to emotions) : “His body was trembling with anger”. P.86 This stands out because it feels like we are feeling this as well.
Apart from #4 being a simile not a metaphor (why?), this is a really good example of identification of language techniques!
DeleteGood work, Matt.
1. The passengers insulated in the fast moving train from the passing landscape and its people
ReplyDelete- Descriptive language, this describes how cocooned the passenger are from the landscape and its people
2. This city it seemed knows how to party
- Personification, the city is inanimate therefore it cannot party
3. Her singing is savaging and urgent
- Descriptive language, the two adjectives bring relevance to her singing so the reader can imagine what it sounds like
4. It is raining and a cold wind is howling- Personification, the wind is not physically capable of howling it is a description of what it sounds like
5. He was such a sweet and doting father.
- Descriptive language, this describes the nature of her father and what he is like to her
Good effort - nice identification of techniques and cleverly chosen quotes. A really good start, Elliot - now we need to go into more detail.
DeleteTo use an analogy, we've toasted the toast, now we need to butter it, spread on some honey and eat it...we're about 1/3 of the way there!
1.And all the while Nina Simone is singing of vengeance.
ReplyDeleteIn this quote you can see the sense of anger and insanity, as people do not sing of their vengeance.
2.Harmless men like my uncle, turning old and senile.
You can notice the descriptive language, which is picturing her uncle as a harmless old and senile person, which she does not care much for.
3.Arms outstretched in robotic unison, paying homage.
This quote is describing the people’s arms as robotic like, being very stiff and stuck.
4. Naked women winked from billboards shop windows blazed with designer label fashions.
This quote is describing that she lives in a modern city like place since there are fashionable billboards.
5.Nuremberg is beautiful don’t you think she says her spirits lifting.
This quote tells us that she is very happy where she lives as she thinks Nuremberg is beautiful.
Good effort, GVDB...
DeleteI very much like your quotes, especially number 3 - a really lovely use of language by Zable.
Techniques? Needs more detail - this will help with your writing and your analysis.
1 “ Hurtling past apartment buildings where cows perch on chimneys.”
ReplyDeleteThis text uses metaphor because the train can’t physically hurtle which makes it a metaphor.
2 “Elderly men and woman sunning themselves o park benches. A solitary woman tending to a graveyard two men seated at a card table on a station platform “
The text uses imagery to show the dread that the Second World War did on berlin. It really shows the suffering of the people and there quality of life.
3 “Buildings follow the natural contours of the river.”
This uses a metaphor to express the internal beauty of the city and how the city works well with its surroundings. He is also seems that he is stating that this city is the best.
4 “Flowers spill the window boxes cathedral spires pierce the heavens. Flight of steps spiral up to the ramps of the city.”
This text uses metaphor at its best with the three statements all using metaphor.
5 “His body was trembling with anger.”
This uses emotive language as it gives us a much deeper feeling to his anger. It also makes you sort of sorry for him.
Good effort, George - some you've done well, some you've slightly missed the point with.
DeleteWe'll go over it in class.
1."No-man's-land"
ReplyDeleteThis quote makes me more interested and i want to find out why this place is called "No man's land"
2. "I fell in love with the city"
Personification- this is personification because she has made a connection(love) that is between two humans, between a woman and a city.
3. “Learner drivers are cruising the weed-infested runway”
This quote makes us see a runway full of cars, cautious drivers and weeds.
4. "Hey gal, finish them floors! Get Upstairs! Whats wrong with you? Earn your keep here!"
This shows us that woman were discriminated against and did not have much authority.
5. “Flowers spill from roof tops”
This shows us what the might look like and what the character is looking at.
Solid start, Shark Finn...
ReplyDeleteNeeds more effort with finding the techniques in the writing. That's really paramount in this unit.
Show me more of your brain in weeks 3 and 4!
English 5 quotes from the wall
ReplyDelete1. “And within seconds the carriage was swarming with uniformed men in jackboots” this quote clearly describes to us not only the security but also the panic for any dangerous weapons or bombs that would endanger many.
2. “Would seal off West Berlin from escaping East German citizens” this quote tells me that the Berlin citizens are clearly trapped in by this “Wall” and are trying all kinds of things to escape.
3. “No man’s land. Up to 100 meters in width, this stretch had become known as the death strip.” What I gather from reading this text is that “no man’s land” is an absolute out of bound, the soldiers would open fire if you stepped one foot in their.
4. “To a showing of Murneau’s a battle between good and evil” this is an ironic quote because in my eyes the Germans were bad and the Belgium’s were defending what was rightfully there’s.
5. “The city was reconstructed from the ruins left after the allied air raids” this is telling us that the Germans were supposed to be an ally but decide to get greedy and take over their own allies.